I Wish I Didn’t Feel This Way

I am realizing

maybe you aren’t as perfect

as I had once thought,

because I’ve told you

what makes me uncomfortable

and your replies only made it worse.

Now I’m waking up from dreams

that seem too realistic to be false,

because I cannot get the thoughts

out of my fucking head.

But what kind of person would I be

to ask you to do something

to make me feel more secure?

Besides, I wanted you to

do it in the first place.

I don’t know if this is

past trauma speaking or

if I’m avoiding red flags,

and it just sucks.

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