It feels like I'm reaching out, grasping at everything I touch, begging everyone to stick around no matter how much they're hurting me. (Or maybe I'm hurting them.) I feel manic in my head, total mess, unhinged or unglued at the core, just begging the lights inside my skull to turn off so I can … Continue reading I Think I Cried Wolf One Too Many Times
Tag: feelings
Little
I just wanted to enjoy you a little longer. I wanted to carry you to the very end. I wanted a reminder that all is good, at a time when all feels so very, very bad. And yet, I'm still lying in this bed, avoiding the mountain of what I need to do, while bleeding … Continue reading Little
Faithless
I'm mad at God right now. Or maybe He's mad at me, cause its been pretty fucking silent on the other side for quite some time. I got in my car, drove for hours last night, screamed at Him until my voice gave out and then cried out noises that broke my own heart. Why … Continue reading Faithless
Aglow
Words spark wildfires inside my mind and trail through the fibers of my soul. I don't bother to address the flames, as I know I am not equipped to handle such a blaze. Inside I sit in the thick of it, engulfed by red and orange light that sears my happiness. To you it's mere … Continue reading Aglow
Honestly
Maybe, just maybe, I am not meant for a world like this; where gravity pulls up my broken pieces, exposes me to the dangers that exist here. Maybe I am too broken to exist.
I’ll Love You Until The Sun Dies
I was so hell bent on keeping walls and locking doors, convinced of how my life would and should look, I almost missed out on you. I'm still unsure how you managed to break in, but I will be forever grateful for you and the plot twist you became. Is it cliché to say life … Continue reading I’ll Love You Until The Sun Dies
This is Why Overthinkers Shouldn’t Be Up at 1 A.M.
I think I've done that thing again; where I break my own damn heart, searching for "A-ha!" moments, and ruminating on painful thoughts. Is this an In-My-Head thing? Or a red flag? I'm just not sure where to go from here...
Self Hatred and an Oversized Tee
I'm fragile, insecure; told to love myself by a society that has taught me not one part of me is truly loveable. Throw in the men who came and reiterated the narrative perpetuated by fashion magazines and filtered Instagram models, and most days I just feel hate when I look in the mirror. So I … Continue reading Self Hatred and an Oversized Tee
Love is Art
Like a delicate snowflake dancing on the tendrils of a red hot fire, I melt beneath your words. Not because they drip with honey-sweet love, but because they're laced with the promises I cling to. You're like spilled black ink on starch white canvas, always changing the picture I'm painting. Fragile and flawed art; I … Continue reading Love is Art
Old Mindset
One simple thing, presumably innocent, and I am right back in an old mindset. Maybe I'm not as secure as I thought. Maybe it's intuition or maybe it's fear. I don't know. All I know is I'm too unbelievably lost inside my head tonight.