I think I've done that thing again; where I break my own damn heart, searching for "A-ha!" moments, and ruminating on painful thoughts. Is this an In-My-Head thing? Or a red flag? I'm just not sure where to go from here...
Tag: people suck
I told someone a little about you, the things you used to do, and once again I forgot it wasn't normal. It made me wonder if you ever do think about those things too; if you feel guilty for losing your morals. Do you think of how you grabbed my wrist out of anger and … Continue reading Monster, Monster
I tried to hold on to you, despite all the tears you'd caused me, because I was told what we had was love. I tried to wrap you in silk, tuck you into the safest corner of my heart, but you were carbon dioxide and I craved oxygen. I needed to let you go. I … Continue reading Exhaling You
Cherry red lines lined along porcelain. Glides over delicate, leaves a stain. The internal is external now. The body betrayed, mind asks how. A two year hiatus thrown away. But she was doing okay. (She wasn’t doing okay.)
I find myself feeling sick to my stomach whenever you cross my mind. The butterflies you once gave me are now just hollowed carcasses left behind to poison me every time I hear your name.
You have no business playing in a field of flowers when your intention is not to be gentle, but instead rip the petals off fragile florets and leave the remaining flowers to die.
More Than A Word
We spend so much time placing emphasis on how "Sorry" is an action and not just a word. For the record, the phrase "Thank you" is an action, too.
It's in the silence of a pitch black room, where the glow of a streetlight outside filters through the slit where curtains meet that I find myself thinking about you. And I can't help but wonder, with my hands trembling at the thought of you, if you feel sorrow when you think of what you … Continue reading Tremble
The words I've left unsaid because I was too afraid of hurting another's feelings or rocking the boat I was in, slip past my lips, spill into the pitch black of night, and haunt me in my sleep. Oh, how I regret being kind when I should've been honest.
You were full of highs and lows, and I pretended that I didn't mind, but the truth is you made me dizzy with your constant changes. I was good before I found you. Then you came in like a whirlwind of excitement and sex and pretty words I was so desperate to hear. I ignored … Continue reading Whirlwind