Shh... Quiet your mind. Inner peace is so hard to find. Feel the feelings, think the thoughts, and hope by morning you've forgot where mouths have been and hands have hit, how loud your head is when you sit and think all those traumatic thoughts. Just hope come sunrise you've forgot.
I promise I'll be better soon. Maybe you see nothing wrong with the way I am, at least you say you don't, but I take issue with my constant need for attention, affection, reassurance. I promise I'll be better soon. I know it can't be easy for you to keep up with my constant mood … Continue reading For The LOML
You're failing, a failure, pull yourself together. Take the scissors, place between heart and head; cut the fucking tether. A mess, no dress, just a void within the shell. You act fine, but sins like that earn you spaces inside hell. What's wrong with you? Stop thinking like that! If you fuck this up, they'll … Continue reading A Poetic Take on Catastrophic Thinking
I am the tide coming into shore; barreling towards the end, no escape in sight. I've already seen so much in my life, and I'm not ready to leave this ocean, but still I see no way to run. I am the tide coming into shore, watching and waiting until I am no more.
I think I've done that thing again; where I break my own damn heart, searching for "A-ha!" moments, and ruminating on painful thoughts. Is this an In-My-Head thing? Or a red flag? I'm just not sure where to go from here...
I'm fragile, insecure; told to love myself by a society that has taught me not one part of me is truly loveable. Throw in the men who came and reiterated the narrative perpetuated by fashion magazines and filtered Instagram models, and most days I just feel hate when I look in the mirror. So I … Continue reading Self Hatred and an Oversized Tee
A male coworker gets in the elevator with me and immediately, I tense up. I know what you're thinking. Not all men are bad. You don't need to worry. And I don't disagree; not all are bad. But how am I to judge who is safe? I didn't think my male friends were unsafe, until … Continue reading Majority Letdown
They say the odds of being struck by lightning twice are in the millions, but it seems like lightning keeps finding me just fine; in the bedroom of a boy I thought I knew, in the arms of a man I thought I could trust, in my own bedroom where I once felt safe. Everywhere … Continue reading The Thunderstorm Cannot Break Me
Like a delicate snowflake dancing on the tendrils of a red hot fire, I melt beneath your words. Not because they drip with honey-sweet love, but because they're laced with the promises I cling to. You're like spilled black ink on starch white canvas, always changing the picture I'm painting. Fragile and flawed art; I … Continue reading Love is Art
I am realizing maybe you aren't as perfect as I had once thought, because I've told you what makes me uncomfortable and your replies only made it worse. Now I'm waking up from dreams that seem too realistic to be false, because I cannot get the thoughts out of my fucking head. But what kind … Continue reading I Wish I Didn’t Feel This Way