Strong-willed, hard-headed, weak-hearted; sugar watered, sour noted, bitter tasted. All things loved, all things wanted, all things hated; me.
Category: Uncategorized
Everything Feels Uncertain Lately, and I Effing Hate It
I have so many questions, some I've asked, and yet no answers to satisfy me. Now all I'm left with is hesitancy, a touch of confusion, and heightened insecurities. I know... It's all "crazy" to you, but I'm still hurt-- shouldn't that matter more? I forgot communication is only key, when it's not acknowledging; our … Continue reading Everything Feels Uncertain Lately, and I Effing Hate It
Seasonal Distractions & Annual Depression
Ruby painted leaves, toasted marshmallow nights, uneven hoodie strings; warm apple cider, and pumpkin patches-- Fall's finer things. The anticipation grows, and I crave Autumn sunsets for the peace that it brings.
The Little Voice in My Head Says I’m Losing You
You've been so distant lately, and I'm not sure what to do. You say it's not us, not me, but I don't quite believe you. If you're so happy with me... ...then why do you look so sad? And it's driving me to look; look for the problem, look for answers. I'm only finding things … Continue reading The Little Voice in My Head Says I’m Losing You
City Name
I watched as you tore me apart, then watched as you fell apart, and not once did I hesitate to put you first. All those hurtful comments, the mocking faces and waving hands, it didn't matter the moment I saw you were in pain. I pulled you into my arms, I held you as tight … Continue reading City Name
I Didn’t Recognize the Man Before Me
Red leather booth. Teary-eyed girl. Angry man. Restaurant packed. Tears spilled. Face flushed with embarrassment. Half-hearted apologies. Hurtful comments. Mixed messages. Unrecognizable. Unbearable. Uncertain. Panicked mind. Racing heart. Fight or flight mode. Name calling. No love. No care. Please stop. Please stay. Please leave. Make up. Forget about it. No conversation. Heart shattered. Memory tainted. … Continue reading I Didn’t Recognize the Man Before Me
There’s Answers in the Avenues You Choose Not to Pursue
I'm not the best at forming my thoughts into words and letting them spill out of my mouth. To be honest, I've been taught that thoughts turned into words can have serious consequences. You keep saying I'm hard to read, hard to understand, and I don't disagree with the statements. Like I said, I've never … Continue reading There’s Answers in the Avenues You Choose Not to Pursue
When It All Comes Crashing Down.
I think I finally grieved all that I needed to last night; sat on the balcony for what felt like hours, cried out pain I've clung onto. I yelled at God for abandoning me, prayed for protection of my life, asked the universe to spare me. I let out all the frustration and fear, all … Continue reading When It All Comes Crashing Down.
The Issue
I'm telling you it bothers me, that it makes me question, but you keep shutting me down with reasons why you shouldn't instead of seeing it upsets me and telling me you will. I get it's not a big deal to you, but you've made it one for me. And you make me feel bad … Continue reading The Issue
Could You Please Keep Your Eyes Off All The Other Girls? Thanks.
I'm pretty insecure, not that much is new there. Be it the past relationships or the dislike for the body I'm in, I'm struggling to see my worth. (Or if I even have any...) Regardless, I feel pretty inadequate and I know the steps to change it, the time it takes to change, but I'm … Continue reading Could You Please Keep Your Eyes Off All The Other Girls? Thanks.
Fire & Female 