Ruby painted leaves, toasted marshmallow nights, uneven hoodie strings; warm apple cider, and pumpkin patches-- Fall's finer things. The anticipation grows, and I crave Autumn sunsets for the peace that it brings.
Tag: help
Faulty
I'm wired wrong, but I don't know how to fix the short circuits. I tried to reroute the wires, manage the cables better, install new software, bypass the problem altogether. Still, the connections are not being made and I'm left faulty and fearful. What if I cannot fix the error? Will I be loved? Cherished? … Continue reading Faulty
The Secret I’m Keeping Is Eating at Me (Stuck in Limbo)
I had an hour drive to the hospital today; another day of pokes and prods and tests. I listened to music without lyrics because I thought hearing words might make me cry. I cried regardless. Honestly, life feels stuck in limbo right now. Like it doesn't matter what I say or do; I might not … Continue reading The Secret I’m Keeping Is Eating at Me (Stuck in Limbo)
Apathetic
The sunlight pours over my skin, but I don't feel it's warmth. I think I'll blame this feeling on the status of my heart.
Cherry Red
Cherry red lines lined along porcelain. Glides over delicate, leaves a stain. The internal is external now. The body betrayed, mind asks how. A two year hiatus thrown away. But she was doing okay. (She wasn’t doing okay.)
Fraud
I'm standing in a walk-in shower with the water on, just begging every droplet of water to get hotter and sear the trauma off of my fragile, porcelain skin. It doesn't, though. I stare through the curtain of water and steam that's filling the room, but my focus isn't on anything in particular. Instead I'm … Continue reading Fraud
Faithless
I'm mad at God right now. Or maybe He's mad at me, cause its been pretty fucking silent on the other side for quite some time. I got in my car, drove for hours last night, screamed at Him until my voice gave out and then cried out noises that broke my own heart. Why … Continue reading Faithless
Fire & Female 