Faithless

I'm mad at God right now. Or maybe He's mad at me, cause its been pretty fucking silent on the other side for quite some time. I got in my car, drove for hours last night, screamed at Him until my voice gave out and then cried out noises that broke my own heart. Why … Continue reading Faithless →

Traumemory

Shh... Quiet your mind. Inner peace is so hard to find. Feel the feelings, think the thoughts, and hope by morning you've forgot where mouths have been and hands have hit, how loud your head is when you sit and think all those traumatic thoughts. Just hope come sunrise you've forgot.

Tell Me to Talk, Because I Need to

I tried to cry out for help, but there were still hands around my throat. I just wanted someone to care; to wrap me in their arms, to kiss my forehead, to say, "Tell me all about it, babe." I've kept my history hidden for so long, I just wanted someone to care to hear … Continue reading Tell Me to Talk, Because I Need to →

Monster, Monster

I told someone a little about you, the things you used to do, and once again I forgot it wasn't normal. It made me wonder if you ever do think about those things too; if you feel guilty for losing your morals. Do you think of how you grabbed my wrist out of anger and … Continue reading Monster, Monster →

Should The Dark Outweigh The Light…

Hostage in my own head, tormented by the trauma I run from. Drowning in fear, bleeding out heartbreak; the false smile I wear fools everyone. Hands around my throat, suffocating the light in me. Slipping into dissociation, reveling in hollowness; the pain might consume me whole. Death knocks on the door, tendency begs for another … Continue reading Should The Dark Outweigh The Light… →

Symptomatic

I was fine. I was fine and then I heard an unfamiliar noise and I couldn't tell where it was coming from, and the first thought that came to mind was How did he find me here? Twenty-three steps between me and safety. I was fine and then I wasn't and I was scared of … Continue reading Symptomatic →

Cherry Red

Cherry red lines lined along porcelain. Glides over delicate, leaves a stain. The internal is external now. The body betrayed, mind asks how. A two year hiatus thrown away. But she was doing okay. (She wasn’t doing okay.)

Cycle

The alcohol burns my throat as it goes down, signs the drink should ease the pain soon. Songs with subtle piano fill the holes in my chest, tug at the strings that cling to my tattered heart. I let the melody serenade me as I sink lower, into a bathtub full of scorched water and … Continue reading Cycle →

Sick

I find myself feeling sick to my stomach whenever you cross my mind. The butterflies you once gave me are now just hollowed carcasses left behind to poison me every time I hear your name.

Two Thousand and Ten

I wish I'd never kissed your lips, because it lit a fire in my soul. You are my greatest mistake yet, and I'm the only one who knows.